I am getting more and more worried as Friday gets closer, it's not that I am concerned about the operation itself but the reality that I, Paula, aged 46 will be having cancer removed. I think it is really starting to hit home now, somehow it all seems more real. I know that I have known for the past 5 months that I have cancer, but somehow, now the ultimate goal is near, it is hitting me hard. I know that I should be excited that at last it will soon be gone and over, but I am really feeling the angst of a cancer victim.
Tomorrow I am going to the hospital for pre-operative tests, to make sure I am all good and ready for the operation. I should be there for about 3 hours, they will also explain what to expect on Friday.
But hey, I am a fighter, I am a survivor. I didn't get where I am today by moping and whinging. So cancer I laugh in your face!!!
Victim or Survivor?
Being a Victim is a state of body. Being a Survivor is a state of mind.
A Victim fears their hair falling out from chemotherapy. A Survivor knows bald is beautiful.
A Victim knows about feeling down. A Survivor knows feeling down is okay.
A Victim is amazed at all the tears. A Survivor never leaves home without Kleenex.
A Victim goes to 'see' a doctor. A Survivor 'consults' with his or her physician.
A Victim gets caught in despair. A Survivor prays a lot.
A Victim feels helpless. A Survivor says 'thanks' with dignity and grace.
A Victim enjoys a good laugh. A Survivor LOVES one.
From the moment we are diagnosed with cancer, we are victims.
We must CHOOSE to be SURVIVORS.
The past, present and future walk into a bar. It was tense
Hi Paula, You certainly tick all the survivor boxes; it was written for you. Hope the hospital doesnt keep you too long today. Will be thinking of you as always. What a five months!!! Lots and lots of love from Deb C xxxx
ReplyDeleteYou are an inspiration to us all with your fantastic attitude and honesty. Good luck with tests, and op on Friday. Will be thinking of you. Love Lisa and family xxxxxxx
ReplyDeletePaula, like Lisa says you truly are an inspiration to us all. I've followed your blog avidly and you have been so upbeat even when you have felt so poorly. Keeping going you are so nearly there. Hope all goes well for you this week. Lindsay & co x x x
ReplyDeleteYour without doubt a survivor but my goodness your allowed a victim moment...keep smiling, Friday has to be a good day besides being my birthday :) Will be keeping you close in thoughts Friday night our time and look forward to the closure of cancer for you - huge hugs, keep smiling xxx
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