Poetry, no motion

Ow, ow, yuck, yuck, day three in my bed 
  No energy; no appetite; a pounding hurting head
I clearly have lost all my brilliant sense of humour! 
  (all thrown in with a small sense of blinkin' beepin' tumour).

It's not the cancer causing this pain
  but the repeated drugs throughout my vein
I know I will feel better by next week
  But still the tears run down my cheek.

I ate the beef, the curly kale, still my bones they ache  
  Next time I'll try some Guinness maybe with a piece of cake
I will be fine, I know its true
  Just give me a day or two....


Man does not live by coffee alone. Have a danish

Legless Again

My view for the past 24 hrs.

Couldn't go to work today, after sleeping all day yesterday and all through the night, I still felt really fatigued. No appetite, my legs don't seem to work from the knee downwards. I am sitting here tapping away with pains in my legs, feeling like the character from the film Misery! Stayed in bed again and slept for the day.

Dr Who in bed night.

Pauls Party.

Tommy and I were meant to go to a surprise party tonight, I had prepared to wear my new outfit; well ho hum, that's still in the wardrobe, PJs still on. Cancelled babysitters and stayed at home to watch Dr Who in bed with the kids whilst Tommy went to the party. Happy Birthday Paul, have a great evening x 

Weight loss mantra? Fat chants

No Caffeine to Keep me Awake

Well, I had a little lie-in and then thought I would head down to the school to show my face for the MacMillan coffee morning, but I was a bit late and most people had gone, so I returned home with every intention of getting to the next coffee morning on time (10.30) down at the fire station. At 12 noon one of my many alarms went off to remind me to take some tablets, which woke me up... I had slept all morning. Couldn't drag myself out of bed to get any food, so just stayed sleeping all day. 

Tommy came home early to meet the kids from their school trip, I did try to get up so that I could go to meet them too, but felt feint and weird, so waited at home. Disappointed with myself for not being able to do what I want when I want. 

The twins came home with stories of their trip and excited to be back home. I am meant to be working Saturday, but the way I am feeling at the moment, is not looking too good for a productive day. Night night my little bloggies and bloggettes. 
  Chemo Queen xx 

Just around the corner,

There's a rainbow in the sky.

So let's have another cup o' coffee,

And let's have another piece o' pie.

~ Irving Berlin, 1932

Sleeping Beauty

Only lasted the morning at work, slipped off to retire to bed where I slept for hours, couldn't face food, but got up to force myself to eat some iron. Tongue swollen, so tired, feel frustrated that I just cannot get anything done. 

When I'm feeling tired at work 
I just use my smart phone to download a nap

Rebecca and Oscar are arriving back from their school trip tomorrow, but I am worried that I won't have the energy to spend quality time with them (they will probably be tired too though)! Well, as Friday is my day off, I can have a lie-in and then take it easy for the day before collecting them.

Tomorrow is MacMillan Worlds Biggest Coffee Morning raising money to help change the lives of people affected by cancer.

http://coffee.macmillan.org.uk/
About/Aboutourevent.aspx#.UGSoAo2PXV8

Paula Pink Pamper Party

A deep peaceful sleep after work today, no kids. Tommy arrived home with a chemo gift, a Laughing Budda for my charm bracelet.

Packed my new wash bag full of hand creams, nail accessories and varnishes, and took it up to Julies for the evening to have a girlie evening with the twin mums, pink nail painting, pink Champagne, pink Smarties. 


I used to meditate a lot, but now I only do it every now and zen

Kaptain Keymo 4

Chemo 4, Lister Hospital Stevenage.

Very quiet at home last night, no children and Tommy went off to a first aid course (not for me, for the football club). The new steroids prevented me from sleeping. Work this morning before setting off for chemo 4/6 Taxotere (docetaxel). http://www.nhs.uk/ipgmedia/national/Breast%20Cancer%20Care/Assets/Taxotere(Docetaxel)(BCC).pdf


Went shopping for steak, prawns, curly kale, spinach, Weetabix, apricots, pumpkin seeds all to help alleviate the low red blood cell count. Refrained from buying Guinness, although when I came home there was a big bar of dark chocolate on my doorstep from Lauren! (Also good for anaemia).


I don't find health-related puns funny anymore since I started suffering from an irony deficiency

Fascinating Bobbie

SUNDAY

We all got up early, kids excited about their trip and Tommy and me about the wedding. We dropped the twins at mum and dads at 9am and headed up to Ipswich. On route we tuned into the local radio station http://www.town102.com as Tommy's cousin had WON their wedding via a competition from Town 102. I sent a text to the radio show, and he read it out.... On our way to Rachel & Pauls wedding, looking forward to a fab day, Tommy and Paula from Hertford. I also requested our wedding song from 14 years ago.

Unfortunately though, I had banged the text out using predictive text and it read Rachel and PAULAs wedding, so the DJ explained that he thought it was the competition wedding, but that perhaps there actually was a wedding for Rachel and Paula that day, so congratulations to them! He then played Kiss from a Rose by Seal for us. 

We all got a red London bus to the wedding venue, Rachel looked beautiful. After the ceremony we caught the bus back to the hotel for speeches and reception. 

A superb wedding, after the meal we hit the dance floor, great 80s disco, all my faves. Dressed Bobbie in a little black feathery fascinator!  

MONDAY

Spent the night at the hotel, got up and met everyone for hungover breakfast. Checked out and said our goodbyes, what a fantastic wedding. Thanks guys.

Tommy and I made our way to the hospital where I had my 3 weekly appointment to check my bloods and see the Oncologist. Today I had to start taking steroids in preparation for my 4th chemo tomorrow, using a different drug. Still a bit anaemic but not low enough to have a blood transfusion but I must now eat more iron to prevent this. My Oncologist suggested that I go back to see my Surgeon to discuss his plans, as now that the cancer has reduced, he may not want to perform the mastectomy but just remove part of the breast, I will discuss this with him.

With her marriage Rachel got a new name and a dress

Stayed in to Wash my Hair

Had a lovely lie in, then got up to wash my hair. Bob took another bath in preparation for the wedding. 

Soggy Bobbie

Started to pack for Oscar and Rebecca, ready to go on the Isle of Wight school trip, labelled everything, then realised that Oscar doesn't have enough pairs of trousers that still fit him to last for a week! Oscar played a football match and Rebecca went to the Brownies sports day. Pulled on a really shiny brown wig (Bob takes a long time to dry naturally) and rushed to the shops to buy 3 new pairs of trousers (by the way we now have beach shoes for Becca). Had a power nap.

Then packed some bits for us, to set off to the wedding tomorrow morning. Will try to find time to blog from the venue, but cannot seem to do it from my phone, so you may have to go a day without me. 


I went to a shoe museum today. It was a load of old cobblers

It's Good to be Green

Got a lovely wash/travel bag from P&D today, absolutely stuffed full of goodies (all individually wrapped in pink tissue paper).... well, that's me packed for our weekend away wedding! 

This afternoon I went to apply a light covering of fake tan in preparation for wearing a dress. When I opened my tube of Fake Bake it had gone green (just imagine). I quickly booked into a salon for a spray tan, She hadn't done bald heads before! Now my scalp nearly matches the rest of me!

So now I am orange!

Without geography, you're nowhere

Not so Fine

The Pub.

Scabby knees here, just checking in to report on my day. Took a break from work today at lunchtime to lunch with Nicki and to catch up at the pub. 

After work I returned to my car to find a parking ticket, the road has recently been redone with fresh new yellow lines, so I figured that these scruffy looking chalk like lines did not count as they had never painted this part, should I appeal?

The Road

Want to know a joke about a parking ticket? "No." 


Fine.

I Shopped, I Dropped...

From Nicki.

Nicki popped into work today with a lovely bouquet for me. I spent lunchtime looking for an outfit for the wedding, a few of the boutique ladies commented how well dresses went with my blonde hair! Fooled them! 

I did try on a few dresses, but they all seemed a bit short. When I went to pick up the twinnies I got out of the car and fell over! It's OK, no-one saw, so it's lucky I didn't get a short dress as I now have big cut/grazes on my knees! And as I have no immune system they will just bruise and not heal easily ready for the wedding on Sunday.

From Lauren

Lauren bought me a lovely little heart to add to my collection. It's all about walking and footprints (I think that's because she's always borrowing my shoes!). 

Luckily no-one saw my fall, but they are amusing

Croc and Roll

Now that I am feeling better again I am noting all the things that I haven't done. 

Kids are away on a school trip next week, Rebecca's Crocs just broke, and there are none to be seen in any store, or anything like a beach shoe. Also her trainers are suddenly "too small". 

We are off to a wedding this weekend, I have my hair sorted (good old Bob) but nothing to wear. AAAAgh!

If only there were enough time to go shopping between work, school and club commitments. 

A Woman has only two problems - Nothing to wear and no room for all the clothes

Not so Burnt Out

Well, my boss claims that my brain is working better since I've been a drugged up, pill popping, self injecting chemohead. 

From Lakshmi

It is so lovely to feel (nearly) normal again. I can eat and drink without it hurting; I can be awake in the day time for more than six hours without feeling ready to flop; I can go upstairs without feeling breathless and I can now go without painkillers instead of counting down every four hours for the next tablets.

It's such a relief (I had my chemo just under 2 weeks ago) that I feel this good again, must remind myself about this feeling when I am next in my low chemo point. I had heard previously about people calendaring the times when they knew they would be good to paaaaaarty!

I received a lovely gift from my friend in Bangalore India today, some beautiful tea light holders.


How long does it take to burn a candle down?
About a wick

10,000 Hits to my Blog

Wow, 10 weeks as a blogger: 68 posts, 159 comments.10,000 hits! 

I love doing my blog and getting all your lovely kind comments back, it really keeps me going, thanks guys especially through the little low points of chemo, but I know that it is doing good (as the results have proved). I do struggle sometimes finding funny puns to put at the end though!

Today was a good day (no nap required). Tim & Lou popped round with a Healthy Eating through Chemotherapy cookbook.

Oscar returned from cub camp a very tired cub.

There are three types of people in the world, those who can count and those who can't

On the Up

After a few days of lying low I went to work today feeling a bit better, hopefully I am coming back up out of that chemo bad spot again. Even took Common Bobbie for first trip to Baroosh after work with the girls for an orange and cranberry juice.

Baroosh Hertford

Tommy took Oscar to football (man of the match trophy) and then on to Cub camp. Rebecca played with her friends on their bikes in the cul de sac. 

Ear ache and indigestion. I still keep finding sticky patches everywhere where they put the pads on for the ECG.

I stared at the juice carton for two hours, because it said Concentrate

Hold onto your Hat

Accessories for Bobbie.

Felt lots better this morning, took the kids to school, but even that walk got me breathless. The weather forecast was for high winds so I put Bob in a scarf, just in case. 

Heidi and Lauren came round for breakfast, at the moment when I eat it hurts, just massive heartburn after each swallow. 

Went to look at cars at lunchtime then came home for a little rest. 

Someone complimented me on my driving skills, they left a little note on my windscreen, it said PARKING FINE

Hopes and Dreams

Last injection for this round. So very hurty bones again. Stayed in bed all day, Sam took the kids to school and back and I phoned in sick, to try and recuperate some energy.

My view today (with Common Bob watching TV)

I selpt on and off in between Come Dine with Me, Escape to the Country, Cash in the Attic, Bargain Hunt and Dickensons Real Deal!

Popped downstairs to find a gift bag on the doorstep. It was a lovely card from Emma, John & Zach, along with a wonderful present; A Pot of Dreams for me to design and to save up for my hopes and dreams, I was so touched, it made me cry. (Will post my design once I have chalked onto the moneybox).

I turned my phone onto “Airplane mode” and threw it up into the air. Worst Transformer Ever

Perfect Pants

Paula's A&E waiting room

Well, my ironing pile has gone down. Mum popped round whilst I was at work and picked up a few bits. The thing is, my airing cupboard is in such a state that the bits at the top, which she so kindly ironed, were not quite on my ironing wish list. But hey, our children now have the smartest pressed pyjamas and pants ever, yes pants!

Busy day at work, home to bed then the chest pains started. Phoned my chemo suite who told me to jump in an ambulance immediately to A&E. Tommy, my local paramedic, rushed me to the QEII A&E (we fancied a change of scenery). I flashed them my get out of jail free card and was immediately put into my own waiting room. I was then taken through to an individual side room where they ran lots of tests, including; bloods; ECG; chest x-ray; etc. A porter arrived to wheel me off to a ward, half way along the corridor a nurse called him back saying that he had got the wrong person! (that could have proved interesting...) Finally discharged, with a good heart (but you all knew that anyway!!), chest pains unexplained. All in a day with Chemo Queen. 

Well done Oscar for being voted as Green Bee at school.


The weather man said there won't be any rain for 6 months... I drought it

Scrummy Mummy

Getting lots of complimentary comments on my 'new hair-do' in the playground from unaware parents. They must think that I have just walked out of the salon each morning, that or I have started to take a little more time on my grooming! Scrummy Mummy. If only they knew it only takes me 2 seconds to do my hair now!

From L&T

From Sonia

Mum popped into work today with a pretty pot of delicate pink roses from L&T. When I dropped Rebecca off at Brownies, before taking Oscar to Cubs, Sonia gave me a little pink present. All the way from the US of A. It's awesome man, I will be wearing it with pride throughout October. 

Over 9,000 hits to my page and so many kind messages via facebook, email and text. I really do appreciated them all... even though I never reply! I also need to do Thank You letters for all the lovely gifts... It's on the list. Chemo Queen xx

A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat

The Iron Lady

So now I have lack of iron... well my ironing pile begs to differ! (Luckily I have mum to aid in that department). At work today Gareth thought he could help with my iron levels by buying me a bottle of liquid made of iron gurders, apparently. It still didn't stop me sleeping after the school pick up. 

Starting to hit my period of Nadir (blood counts reaching their lowest point 7 – 10 days after the chemo), leaving me more susceptible to risk of infection and bleeding.

What's the difference between Iron Man and Iron Woman?... Iron Man is a superhero. Iron Woman is a command

Another Day, Another Department

A few chemo side affects through the night, one being a rash on my left arm, so, this morning, as previously advised, I telephoned the Mount Vernon hotline, who advised me to go straight to A&E. Family Collins set off for a day trip to the Lister, where, with my super 'ALERT' card I was taken away from any other risk of infection and was seen straight away. (It's better than a Get out of Jail Free card)!

I had lots of blood pressure and temperature checks, blood tests and examinations. I was eventually discharged with low haemoglobin count. 

Feeling fatigued.

Be Alert, the world needs more lerts!

Charlotte goes Scarlet

"Why did you cut your hair?"

Lots of energy this morning, got lots of chores done, then flopped! 

The neighbours came down to play and little Charlotte saw me without my hair for the first time, it was a bit of a shock for her... >>>>>

They bought me a lovely bottle of pink fizz to celebrate my half way, half gone point. Let's hope I don't get half cut! 












If a clock is hungry does it go back four seconds?

50% Reduction

After school drop off I met the twin mums for breakfast at Van Hages. I popped into the wig shop as Common Bob needed a trim.... yes, that's right the fringe had grown! (when I was first fitted I had my hair underneath so the piece, as they call it, sat higher). 

In the afternoon I went along for an ultra sound scan at the QEII and they told me that now, half way through my chemo, the cancer has reduced by half - 50% - demi!!!!!!  I don't even think he could really see any cancer in the armpit lymph nodes anymore. 

Yee Ha!

Well done Kaptain Keymo! 


Why is the third hand on a clock called the second hand?

Bling it On

Over 8,000 page hits. Spread the word.

Last day at work until Monday. Rebecca came out of school today having been elected for School Councillor for year 5, well done Councillor Collins! 

The QEII in Welwyn Garden City phoned today to arrange ultra scan for tomorrow afternoon, to check my progress after 3 chemos. They will be checking to see if the cancer is reducing in preparation for my surgery.

Great granny's 
diamond ring, Links 
sweety charm, Italian 
bracelets & my Charity 
Chemo bracelet

From Mike & Judith.. 
Thank you P xx

Sonia gave me two pretty bracelets from Italy to add to my blinginess. I also came home to some beautiful pink roses from Mike and Judith. Lauren popped round then I slept. I am so lucky to have such wonderful friends, as are mum and dad, and family too. 

I am back on combinations of tablets four times a day and then start the self injections again tomorrow.


I am getting really good at jigsaw puzzles, I finished 1 in just over a week, when the box said 2-4 years! 
Boom boom

LOVE my Prince CHARMing

Dib, dib, dib, dob, dob, dob.

Oscar came home from Cubs last night, and is now a Sixer, he was so proud! More badges to sew on! If he carries on this way he'll end up as a Queen's Scout like his Pops.

I had forgotten that on the day of chemo I cannot sleep at night although I am exhausted.

Another very busy day at work, then home to catch up on the ironing.. the first evening in ages that I haven't collapsed into bed for a power nap. 

My heart.

Tommy bought me another beautiful charm for my bracelet as my 3rd chemo gift. 

If Federal Express and UPS were to merge, would they call it FED UP?

Kaptain Keymo 3

Kaptain Keymo, zap, zap, zap.

I set off to work early, Tommy took the kids down to school. Back to the hospital midday for Kaptain Keymo 3, half way! The last of FEC click for link (pink stuff to you lot), next 3 they will change the drug to T (I like tea). 

They tried to find another vein as the chemo so far has damaged my vein, it has become hardened and is painful. 

Sat in here for 3 hours today.

Half way through chemo treatment, only 3 left.

Because I'm worth it!

Came home to a lovely vase of flowers in my bedroom.... thanks Mum and Dad xxx

Kids loved their first day back with the new teacher, and enjoyed catching up with their friends. 

If at first you DO succeed, 
try not to look astonished!

Monday-ne

Carpenters? Oasis? The Proclaimers? Donny & Marie?...

Feeling a bit brighter today. Nice and busy at work. Tommy had taken the day off to look after the kids on their last day of holiday and to take me to the hospital. Left work to get to my hospital appointment with Tommy, had to wait one and a half hours. All went well; bloods good to go for tomorrow. Back to work before going home for my afternoon snooze. Tommy organised the twins guitar practice and took them to their swimming lesson. Both are excited and looking forward to starting year 5  back at school tomorrow. 


If it’s sent by ship then it’s a CARgo, if it’s sent by road then it’s a SHIPment